Dealing with difficult people at work can be unbearable. You may sit across a cubicle or office from someone you find quantifiably exhausting. #DifficultPeople

Here Are Six Types of Difficult People and How to Deal with Them

1. Know-It-All
2. Gossipmonger
3. Twenty-Four-Seven Complainer
4. Credit Creator
5. Airy-Fairy
6. Victim

Their behaviour can have a huge impact on your emotional health and happiness.

Many people deal with a complicated person (or more), despite their best efforts to avoid them and their issues.

It is no fun whether it is your boss, co-worker, or client.

Dealing with Difficult People Can Be a Complete Pain

There are people in our lives who we do not hit it off with. They can drive you utterly bonkers.

There is always someone who does not agree with what you do, how you do it, and even who you are. They are out there and they’ll find your Achilles heel.

It is draining, frustrating and mentally challenging.

Learning How to Cope with Difficult People | #HowTo

The workplace is a hodgepodge of employees with varying interests, goals, and personalities.

If you work in a big company, there is a good chance your personality and interests do not match up with at least one of your colleagues.

Ironically many go to great lengths to avoid difficult situations, but end up having to deal with them, anyway.

We have an unfortunate tendency to procrastinate when it comes to these problems until we have no choice but to face them. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it is a fact we can’t ignore.

We deal with difficult people at one time or another, and learning how to cope with such challenges proves fruitful. Estienne de Beer #EstienneDeBeer

There are steps you can take to weather the storm and even harness their negative energy for your ends if need be.

This person is always right. No matter what. They know everything about everything, and it is their way or the highway.

When you try to politely offer your own opinion, a “Know-It-All” finds a way to shut you down and put you back in your place.

If you have a question, they are happy to answer it – in fact, they’ll probably interrupt you mid-sentence to tell you what they would do before you have even finished asking your question.

A “Know-It-All” has to be right about everything, and they will go to great lengths to prove their point.

They assume they know everything and you know nothing about any topic. They often make you feel frustrated, humiliated, or stressed out when talking to them.

• Ask a “Know-It-All” to clarify her/his point of view. This will either expose their faulty logic or force them to acknowledge there are diverse ways of looking at things.
• Do not take the bait by engaging in an argument or even raising your voice. Get your emotions under control before continuing with the discussion.
• Do not be afraid to set things straight.
• Do not let them trap you in time-wasting arguments.If the “Know-It-All” keeps trying to debate every point you make, say something like, “I do not think we’re going to agree on this,” and then change the subject.

  You might also negate their interruptions by saying, “OK, now let me finish.”

• Keep a cool head and avoid getting sucked into their vortex of smugness.
• Sometimes you can ignore the “Know-It-All”. It is then better to walk away from them instead of arguing since it wouldn’t change their way of thinking.

To handle the “Know-It-All”, prepare for every meeting with them by doing extensive research beforehand.

You have been talking about your new diet and then, as if you have some “Gossiper” radar, all of a sudden, the person you are speaking to starts telling you about someone else who’s also trying to lose weight.

You know full well that is not why they are telling you this, nor is it the reason why they are whispering instead of talking normally.

They want to fill you in on the latest office rumours and hearsay!

The best thing to do if you are dealing with a “Gossipmonger” is to stop talking to them, but sometimes it’s not that simple.

“Gossipmongers” are poison in the workplace, and you can’t afford to let them spread their venom through your immediate work environment.

Here are ways to consider when your office is riddled with gossip:

• Ask the “Gossipmongers” for evidence to back up what they are saying. Most likely, they’ll say no – and that is when you need to tell them tactfully how irresponsible it is to spread malicious rumours with no proof.
• If someone is spreading rumours about you in the office, you can also call them out.
• If they are gossiping about someone else, do not participate in it. Gossiping creates a vicious cycle because, when people hear others talking about them negatively behind their backs, it makes them more likely to gossip about the “Gossipmongers”. If you participate in the gossip by laughing along with it or joining in on conversations about other people’s personal lives without their knowledge or consent, then it will be harder for the “Gossipmonger” to see why they shouldn’t continue doing so themselves. It might even qualify you as a “Gossiper”.
• Ignore them. This is the most important thing you can do, and it is often overlooked. People who gossip are looking for attention, and ignoring them might end their behaviour pretty quickly.
• Keep your personal information private.
• Set up a meeting between yourself and the “Gossipmonger” in which you explain how their talking negatively affects everyone around them (including themselves).
• You can change the subject by asking them about something completely unrelated. Not only will this help divert their attention from all those juicy office rumours, but it might even help show them the error of their ways.

If the “Gossipmonger” insists on spreading rumours around the office, walk away. At times, there is nothing more you can do.

Dealing with a “24/7 Complainer” is frustrating and distracting.

Sometimes you are going to encounter them at work, and it is pretty much guaranteed to drive you up the wall.

A “24/7 Complainer” can single-handedly ruin the positive relationships built among your co-workers.

It is tempting to ignore them and hope they disappear, but it is not always realistic.

• After acknowledging their thoughts, try to reframe these in a positive light.
• Call out their behaviour in a constructive way.
• Differentiate between a colleague who needs to vent and the “24/7 Complainer”.
• Do not be afraid to speak up if they say something wrong or hurtful. If you are unsure whether they have a point, ask them if they have any suggestions or solutions.
• Do not let yourself get caught up in their negativity. Don’t get stuck standing around listening to someone complain all day long.
• Try to understand how they think. Often, they don’t have control over their lives or work environment, so they turn to complaining as a way of feeling like they’ve made a difference.

Have you ever worked with someone who manufactures self-credit out of thin air? They take the credit when their input is minimal or even absent. It is unpleasant to be around them.

They ride on the coattails of your hard work and achievements. Your blood might boil, and you feel frustrated and in disbelief.

A “Credit Creator” is looking to be in the spotlight. They believe they are more deserving than their colleagues. In their minds, they are of higher status or have more “experience”. In reality, the “Credit Creator” are only out for themselves.

• Ask them directly what they think they contributed to a project and how much credit they should receive. They might backtrack when confronted with their own words.
• Be patient. Sometimes these things take a while to resolve themselves and there is not much more you can do until they do.
• Be prepared for the “Credit Creator” and stand up for yourself in a way that lets you keep your cool and integrity.
• Document your exchanges as proof of their actions. You might need it.
• Do not cause drama.
• It helps if you have a trusted ally at work who has your back on this issue. You can ask them to observe your co-worker taking credit for your work when it happens so they can corroborate your version of events if it comes down to a he-said/she-said situation with management.
•  It might be necessary to escalate things. Consider calling the “Credit Creator” out. If you do not mind getting confrontational, it might stop them from doing it again.

  A simple but viable approach is to say something like: “When you took credit for the idea I had at last week’s meeting, I was really surprised.”

• Keep track of all your work. If you have been keeping a “paper trail” documenting everything you have done on a project, you have proof of having contributed more than anyone else. The proof can make it harder for the person stealing credit from you.
• Learn about how the “Credit Creator” is operating. Are they purposefully lying about being involved in something, or are they flubbing the details? Knowing these answers helps you figure out how to handle it.
• Sometimes people do not realise they are taking credit for other people’s ideas, so if you can be clear and direct with them about how their behaviour makes you feel, they might stop.

The “Airy-Fairy” has her/his head in the clouds most of the time. They are daydreaming about what life would be like if they lived on Mars or some other fantasy land far from reality.

They tend to be distracted and prefer to do things their way, even if it means neglecting tasks that need to be done.

They are dreamy and impractical. They might seem a little crazy but does not mean to harm anyone in the long run.

The “Airy-Fairy” is often scatterbrained and can’t seem to stay focused long enough to get a job done.

• Avoid leaving any room for interpretation in your communication, so there is no excuse for mistakes later on down the line.
• Do not let them change the subject – if they start talking about something irrelevant, steer them back to what you were talking about beforehand.
• If the “Airy-Fairy” complicates work because they keep changing their mind, tell them how it affects you negatively.
• If they avoid making a decision or keep on postponing, stay firm. Tell them you need an answer or the time for gathering information is unfortunately over – you need a decision now.
• Look for something concrete – detail helps you to ground them in reality.
• Only tell the “Airy-Fairy” what he/she needs to know for the task. Make sure you have time in your schedule for when (not if) things go wrong as a result of their absent-mindedness.
• Set boundaries and deadlines if you can, and make everything visual and tangible.
• They can also be helpful and supportive because they usually are in touch with other people’s emotions.

The “Victim”, also known as the “Martyr”, blames everyone else for their mistakes and struggles and never takes responsibility for improving or lack of learning.

When confronted with their failings, they might become emotional or lash out at others instead of taking responsibility for what went wrong.

This can lead to toxic behaviour and a lack of trust among team members, who recognise this person is avoiding accountability by blaming others for their failures.

• Engage the “Victim” as little as possible. You do not have to be mean, but you don’t need to drop everything for them either.
• Do not let yourself be intimidated. If it is true this person is playing the “Victim” to get attention, keep in mind other people notice too. It may help to talk the situation over with someone without gossiping.
• Do not try to make this person happy. It won’t work.
• Being around the “Victim” might add fuel to the fire and may cause you to be dragged into their game of victimisation.
• Talk to them when you feel they’ve gotten out of hand and need to be spoken to directly. Do so privately and calmly explain how their behaviour influences the work environment. The Meerkat Motivator #MeerkatMotivator
• Try to ignore them. It may sound counterintuitive, but often when someone is feeling ignored, they’ll move on to get attention. If they get frustrated by your lack of response, they may find another ear more willing to hear them out.

Understand this person has a problem but it’s not yours. You are not responsible for how someone else feels or acts.

You may be able to empathise with them, but you are not responsible for making them feel better about themselves.