Providing feedback can be a tricky thing, regardless of your career stage or job title.

This is because how you do it can greatly impact how the recipient receives it and the action ultimately taken.

Here Are 10 Pointers for Constructive Feedback That Work Well

1.  Avoid beginning with a negative statement.

2. Be respectful, even when the evaluation is tough.
3. Be specific.
4. Own your body language with full awareness.
5. Discuss behaviour and performance, not personality.
6. Do not catch the listener off guard.
7. Feedback must be balanced.
8. Focus on a single issue at a time.
9. Provide feedback in person and pick an appropriate location.
10. Hear the other person’s perspective before sharing your assessment.

Struggle to provide feedback now and then? You are not alone!

Feedback fuels every workplace relationship, from teammates to bosses. Keeping everyone grounded in reality is a must on the job!

Giving constructive feedback honestly and professionally can be challenging. Unfortunately, it can lead to tense conversations and awkward moments.

In the workplace, it is a consequential part of professional progression but might lead to sour relationships.

The workplace functions with the necessity of providing constructive and encouraging feedback.

The goal is to communicate with the person who sits in front of you about the good, bad and the ugly. What is its impact on the team?

It can boost your morale and help you take the necessary steps to develop your abilities and skills in areas where you may be lacking.

However, many well-meaning people fail to provide relevant and timely feedback.

This process is a game changer for your professional growth. It can be an effective coaching tool for building strengths and effectiveness at work.

This is an ongoing process that helps people improving at their jobs, achieve goals, and improve their performance.

Collecting and communicating the results for feedback is a task many are expected to do without proper training, tools, and techniques.

Why? Because it might feel like a punch to the gut. The listener you are attempting to provide feedback to might be so knocked off their feet that they can not take in what you are saying.

The problem can be that the receiver only hears the negative part at first. When you start on a high note, the receiver immediately gets into an open, receptive mindset that makes them more likely to hear and absorb your feedback.

Instead, lead with an uplifting statement that acknowledges a strength. Everyone knows the saying, no surprises here: “You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.” 

Sometimes coworkers miss the mark or overlook where they can grow and improve.

A negative statement like “This is not what I asked for” can come off as harsh and demeaning.  If you begin your feedback like this, you are setting yourself and the recipient up for failure.

It is essential they feel comfortable and receptive to the feedback you are giving.

The challenge with opening feedback with negative statements is that it makes people feel attacked, belittled, or stupid.

It puts them on defense and they might shut down or lash out. That is not the kind of environment you want to create if you are trying to motivate your team to be creative and productive.

Avoid beginning your statement with “You should have” or “could have” or “You would have been better off if.“

It is no secret that many of us have a natural inclination toward negative feedback.

And it makes sense that we are wired to detect problems rather than performance already working well.

Start by asking for the person’s input into their performance.

This helps them experience more control. Negative statements are mostly interpreted as you being judgmental and critical. You can make the person receiving the feedback feel defensive and less likely to accept it.

We are hard-wired for self-preservation and constantly scanning for threats.

Simply put: Avoid beginning your feedback with a negative statement. Start with the positive or neutral before moving to the rest. Consider how you should phrase things in the most constructive way possible.

The idea is that tough feedback should be delivered in a manner that it can be received with dignity and respect.

Choose your words with care. Swap “You missed the deadline” for “The deadline was missed” to keep it sharp and neutral. The word choice makes all the difference in how someone receives your feedback.

Be sure to maintain a respectful tone. When you are being respectful during feedback, it is easier for your co-workers and colleagues to trust you.

Respect is the core of all professional interaction. Use kind words. It is crucial to be polite and considerate in your speech.

Your tone matters. Even if you use well-chosen words, your tone will either add or detract from the impact they have on others.

Remember that tone is more than what words you use. It is also how you say them.

So, take care of how you communicate. Bring positivity into it and avoid sarcasm or condescension.

Vague feedback is like a maze where the walls keep moving. It can be hard for co-workers to understand what is expected of them.

They might find themselves struggling over how to meet expectations because they do not know exactly what those expectations are.

The more information you can give to others, the better. It might seem like it would take longer to lay out your thoughts so specifically, but actually, it will take less time in the long run.

When you use specific details to describe a co-worker’s behaviour, it also makes your message much more convincing and memorable.

For instance, instead of saying “good job” you can say “I loved your presentation! The slides were really professional-looking, and you integrated the major points very effectively. Well done for staying on the message and highlighting the core WIFM”.

This helps colleagues learn what exactly they did well.

If you are giving criticism, explain exactly what caused the challenge. What could have been done differently to avoid it, rather than saying “you messed up.“

This gives them room to improve, without feeling like their work is just being criticised.

During work communication, we often forget about our body language.  

We are so focused on getting the words out of our mouths that we forget to keep our bodies in check.

So, what can we do to be mindful of others during conversations?

First, we can practise using an open stance with our arms uncrossed in front of us and with our hands open. We can also keep eye contact without staring so intensely that the listener gets uncomfortable.

Your body language can make your words feel negative or positive. The message you are giving verbally should be supported by the message you are giving nonverbally.

For example, if you say “I am really happy with the work you did” but your tone sounds bored or frustrated, that becomes a problem.

You cannot expect people to trust what they hear when it does not match up with what they see.

Sitting behind a desk while talking can make someone feel like they are in a lecture room. You want them to feel equally-footed.

Here are general tips for body language during your next round of feedback:

• Look others in the eye.
• Do not cross your arms or hunch over. Show open, positive, and welcoming body language at all times.
• Showing a smile is an easy way to convey that you are meaning well.
• Keep your hands in front of you.
• Be mindful of proximity.
• Try not to cross your legs and arms, which can indicate a defensive posture.
• Lean in a little when listening to the recipient. You want them to know you are engaged, but not that you are hovering over them and breathing down their neck.
• Nod your head regularly, which shows that you are listening.

When you are discussing performance or behaviour that needs improvement, you might be tempted to make it a conversation about personality.

Focus on behaviour.

Remember this: personality stays fixed, but your actions can change at any moment.

To make your feedback effective and actionable, discuss what the colleague did, what they should do instead, and why it is imperative.

Focusing on a co-worker’s personality will make them feel like they are being personally attacked.

The last thing anyone wants is to experience that they are not good enough as a person.

If someone has to change their behaviour, it is better to address their actions. Do not criticise them as a person. Explain how their actions are affecting the team.

Instead of making statements about personal traits, focus instead on specific actions and behaviours that the person can change.

When you provide feedback by focusing on personality (“you are too quiet”), it tends to feel very judgmental and personal. This can cause the receiver to get defensive and shut down, instead of actually taking in your real message.

Ideally, share feedback during a planned discussion. That way, everyone will have time to prepare and think.

If immediate feedback is on the cards (e.g. a safety concern), it is imperative not to take someone by surprise.

Ease them into the conversation by starting with some positive feedback, then transition into what should improve.

Do not ambush someone during a feedback session.  

No matter how urgent your message is, this could trigger a negative emotional response. Attempt to provide feedback when you both feel comfortable. The Meerkat Motivator

Feedback is best given when a person is ready to receive and process it.

Prepare well for hard-to-hear feedback. Both parties should be ready to engage with one another.

Criticism is not something that should happen in the public eye. It will cause humiliation and major rifts between people.

This breeds contempt. People would not feel secure enough to share ideas or take intelligent risks in their key performance areas.

Ambush with positive feedback though. You cannot go wrong by catching a co-worker off guard with good and uplifting assessments!

It will give them a tremendous boost.

Open praise helps build confidence and self-esteem. It lets colleagues know they are on track and should continue on this successful path. #MeerkatMotivator #MeerkatMotivationalSpeaker

It also highlights productive behaviour and best practices for everyone else to hear and see.

Top organisations are striving to create an environment of feedback to encourage better performance.

Do not be overly critical during feedback. Would anyone like to hear all about their shortcomings all the time?

Constant negative evaluations put people on edge. It discourages them from taking risks and leads to feelings of being overly critiqued. This is never a good environment for stimulating innovation.

Balancing tough feedback with positive vibes is key to a breakthrough.

If you have a colleague who continues to perform well despite setbacks or struggles, let them know how much you appreciate their perseverance.

You will find that a balanced approach helps co-workers feel less discouraged about shortcomings. They are encouraged by what is going well. Estienne de Beer #EstienneDeBeer

The other side of the coin is also applicable. If only optimistic feedback is given, then that co-worker may become overconfident or believe they are “above” their work. Then there is the ironic risk of becoming complacent.

This helps the individual better understand what they should do differently. Your critique is not getting lost in a sea of other issues.

It is easy to forget that a recipient can only absorb some information at a time. If you share useful particulars about multiple matters at once, it will likely overwhelm them.

Focusing on numerous points simultaneously tends to be overwhelming.  

Tsunami feedback does not work!

Instead, start with one issue you believe is most pressing or crucial to solve. Then support that recommendation with relevant alternatives and examples.

Most people can not take in numerous pieces of criticism at once. It is difficult to remember multiple criticisms and suggestions for improvement simultaneously.

It is crucial to determine the location and style of delivery. When possible, choose a face-to-face interaction.

Giving feedback in person is always preferable to giving it remotely.

When done in person:

• You can observe facial expressions and body language.
• The recipient can ask questions and get clarification.
• You see their reaction immediately, which helps a lot with gauging the temperature.
• Ensures that there is little room for miscommunication or misunderstanding.

When at an appropriate location:

• You can communicate clearly and privately.
• There are no distractions or interruptions.
• It is free of noise and clutter.
• No one overhears; hence confidentiality is ensured.

It is easy to rush into an advice-giving mode.

But taking that extra step of hearing your co-worker out can go a long way toward building trust. You want to achieve a more collaborative solution.

Hear their perspective before you start offering feedback.

Do not jump straight into your thoughts before understanding the other person’s perspective.

You risk misinterpreting their intentions or missing valuable specifics that could help inform your feedback.

It also demonstrates that you respect them as a colleague, which will help build your relationship.